| Josh vs. Cancer: Ballistic |
[ | | TUESDAY, OCTOBER 20, 4:02 PM] |
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The beeping of the hungry copying machine... |
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I'm sure none of you get the movie reference. Doesn't matter. I'm writing this so everyone's in the loop about my cancer/goiter/god-knows-what woes. Specifically about how I'll be getting surgery on the 20th of November.
So, I'm pretty sure most of you know about my adventure with this since April. The surgery is the only NEW piece of info. If you want a recap, read on. But if you're only curious about the latest news,, see the section marked SURGERY.
THYROID CANCER (kinda)
So, it all started in March/April, when I was home, and my mother noticed that my neck had a large bump. We thought my lymph nodes were enlarged and I was possibly infected or sick and didn't realize it. I was seeing the doctor anyway, so we asked him what he thought, not thinking much of it. That was until he told us it wasn't my lymph node. It was my thyroid, which should never be that big.
Before i knew it, I was rushed in for a sonogram and they saw a growth there. A bad one. When your doctor implies the worst, and your family has a history of thyroid cancer (grandmother), things get grim. I was in and out of doctors, getting a total of 3 biopsys trying to determine what I actually had.
It turns out, after the second one, that the sist, huge as it was, was benign. Though they didn't tell me this till I was getting my THIRD biopsy (a whoopsee on the doctors part...I was pretty pissed, but that's a story for another time...this is just for the info). However, while it was likely to stay benign, I'd have to keep an eye on it my whole life and I'd always look like I had a chicken bone stuck in my neck. I wanted it gone. So I went to see a surgeon to discuss my options.
SURGERY
With a cist this size, that side of my thyroid is probably not even functioning anymore. So it can be removed without having to take any supplemental medications to make up for a lack of a thyroid. However, while I'm under, they will be doing another 'biopsy' on the removed part of the thyroid, and find out if I really am benign or malignant. If I am malignant (and we just couldn't get a real reading), then while I'm under, they will take out the whole thyroid and I will be on medication for my whole life, followed by me taking an iodine radiation pill. Basically I will become radioactive and shouldn't be allowed around pregnant women and children for a week while the radioactive iodine locates any cells from the thyroid that got spread and annihilates the hell out of them.
So am I in danger? No. I'm pretty safe. All things considered, I'm not psyched about the surgery, which is why I wanted it done ASAP so I could move on with my life. It's been a long few months. The surgery is November 20th, the Friday before thanksgiving. I will be int he hospital for about a day before going home and recuperating. I could probably go back to work on Monday, Tuesday the latest. If I need to take that iodine pill, I extend my 'vacation' by a week while I crap glowing poo (not really, but that'd be awesome).
So yeah, now you all know. I'll answer any other questions you have, but now you know what's going on. Come the beginning of November, this will be a bad memory and I can move on with my life. As my boss says "After 20, it's all down hill."
Thank you all for your support. I'll keep you posted on any updates.
I'm OUT!
-Josh
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| Holy Character Assasination, Batman! |
[ | | FRIDAY, JANUARY 30, 10:34 AM] |
So, about a year ago, I started ranting and raving about me never reading Spider-man again, since it soiled its very ground in an attempt to boost sales and gain new readers. All it seemed to do was isolate hardcore fans be the biggest joke of the wall-crawlers career since the Clone Saga. And like that, the entire decision to have a superhero make a FUCKING DEAL WITH THE GODDAMN DEVIL will probably be retconned in a year or two, and laughed at, and then redone (better) in Bendis's Ultimate Spider-Man book. I bring this up because Batman has now joined Spider-Man's ranks in books I refuse to read.
Yes. Batman. Fucking Batman.
Allow me to explain. Writer Grant Morrison has stated that he planned to retire Bruce Wayne as Batman, culminating with an arc appropriately titled "Batman RIP." This title would be followed up in the "Final Crisis" epic (which Morrison was also writing), where we learn the ultimate fate of Batman. From what readers were to understand, the two would play off each other. For starters they didn't. They say it does, but honestly, it seems really loose and unconvincing. Like they slapped some masking tape on the two stories and said "There: now they're tied together." More or less, it was Bruce's last big outing as Batman in an adventure that started epic and heart pulling, but just turned out to be silly. To give you a quick recap, someone figured out his identity, injected Batman with crack, drove him crazy, and systematically started shutting down the very fabric of Bruce's life. Putting the robins on the run, torturing Alfred, releasing the Joker on his girlfriend, etc. This person also claimed to be Thomas Wayne, Bruce's dead father. This is an awesome plot. Random, maybe, but epic in nature and fascinating to study. Makes you really understand why Bruce would retire after this, but how's he gonna get out of it. But then, then it's revealed Batman FUCKING PLANNED FOR THIS ALL ALONG AND WAS ACTING THE PART ENTIRE ARC! What kind of Saturday morning cartoon shit is that? You couldn't think of how Batman was gonna get out of that one and so you just claimed he took acting lessons from Alfred? Are you fucking kidding me? It's like when Luke decided the best way to get to Jabba the Hutt and rescue Han was to put all his other friends in danger first instead of just beating the bad guys up from the start.
Removed from that, then came "Final Crisis," and that's where I reached my breaking point. Around the part where Darkseid kills Bruce (but doesn't) and sends him back in time.
No, you read that right. They retired Batman, by sending him back in time.
I would like to walk you through exactly how Batman was retired. Tell me if any one of these things sounds Batman AT ALL!
1) Batman uses a gun to shoot a man.
2) Batman shoots the man with the intent to kill.
3) The man being shot by Batman is not a Gotham crook or the Joker, but a fucking demi-God.
4) Batman gets lasered by said demi-God until he's dead.
5) Batman is sent back to the time of dinosaurs and makes cave drawings in Batman garb.
There is not one part of this I am making up. This is what happened. Are you fucking kidding me? Is this a joke? The fact that Frank Miller's recent All Star Batman and Robin is truer to character than this is mind blowing. I'd rather that crap be canon than this thing ever being released in one form or another. It's like, Morrison has never read or seen anything Batman before and has no grasp on the character or what he stands for or what he is.
No death in comics is permanent, so death ultimately means nothing (which saddens me, and takes away from the impact), but Jesus Christ, can you at least try?! You are retiring THE SYMBOL of comics everywhere. The very definition of Super Hero cool. One of the most respected and revered and loved characters of all time!!!
I want to say I was excited with the prospect of Bruce retiring or dying and letting someone else take up the cowl and trying to make a new Batman. I was curious to see how someone who isn't Bruce could possibly even try to take up the mantle. But the end doesn't justify the means. Just because you can do things this way, doesn't mean you should. Bruce has had an amazing career as a legendary figure and he deserved a better send off than this! A character like Batman shouldn't be the afterthought of "Final Crisis," a book so focused on the Flashes and Superman. His retirement story (regardless of how temporary), should be legendary. I won't be arrogant enough to say HOW it should have happened, but to end Bruce's run as Batman by having him do things that just ARE NOT BATMAN AND TOTALLY DEMEAN THE CHARACTER is wrong. It's 100% wrong. Just because Batman can be sent back in time by a demi-God after shooting him with a gun, doesn't mean you should. It doesn't make it more epic just because he's never done it before. It's like ending the Simpsons with Homer raping Mrs. Crabapple and then Bart and Lisa fusing so they can fight Maggie's evil twin from the future (though, I would watch that episode).
I really dug Morrison's All Star Superman and his New X-Men books. But he fucked the Dark Knight. He fucked him good. Morrison, you really fucked up. DC Comics, you fucked up even more by allowing this to happen.
Rot in hell Batman. It's a better fate than ever letting Grant Morrison near you again.
 
I'm OUT!!
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| Reflections |
[ | | THURSDAY, DECEMBER 25, 8:53 PM] |
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I’m sitting here, looking through a few things. Specifically all my Fenix Gear work. It’s been exactly one year since I finished issue 1 of Fenix Gear (which looks like it might be renumbered to issue #0).
Fenix Gear has come a long way this last year. There was me trying to get the damn thing printed, there was my experience getting chewed out at comic con, there’s the issue I was doing with Twist that never got to be, there was the successful mini issue that had me trying something new, there was working with Omar, Chris, Stephen, Twist, and Jim on various accounts, my meeting Chrissy, me seeing Chrissy’s art and being inspired to write this new issue, and now we’re here.
As I type this, Chrissy is currently doing the pencils on the first page of her first comic for Fenix Gear. First of many, I hope, since I enjoy working with her so much. I take this time now to see how far Leylie, Zoe, and Carolyn have come.
The idea behind Fenix Gear is old, spanning back to my sophomore days in High School. It was a constantly evolving process (did you know the main character was a guy with a dark God inside him in the beginning). It slowly spun and turned in my head until I came up with this fascinating tail about three girls trying to be heroes, but can’t get it right. I made a decision in September 2006 to make a comic. I had to get up and do something. What began was a +1 year of working on my first issue of Fenix Gear with Stephen Krock in a tediously harsh lesson on the wrong way to ink and color comics. 1 Year ago, I birthed my creation into the world. It’s 1 year old today. Happy Birthday Fenix Gear.
The decision to move forward with Gear, rather than let it wrestle in my imagination until I’m old and grey, has changed my life. For the better. It has given me motivation and drive. It’s given me something to truly care for that’s bigger than myself. It keeps me from being sucked into the grind of boring life and leaves me with a sense of…hope. A sense that I’m doing something worthwhile. It’s…love. True love. Nothing else comes close to describing it. Fully and truly and whole heartedly, I love Fenix Gear.
I can’t wait to show you guys what’s next. I can’t wait to show you what me and Chrissy have planned. The stories we want to tell. The characters we want to introduce. The hope that we feel emanating from this project. A friend told me she believes in Fenix Gear. Jim, originally unsure of taking on another project, has put a hold on his own work for mine because he believes in Fenix Gear. This product has effected more than me. We all believe in it. And that sort of thing…it means worlds to me.
Thank you, everyone. Thank you so much for this.
I wish you all a happy holidays.
-Josh
Me: hey
Me: was just writing about you
Chrissy: hey
Chrissy: you were? what about?
Me: its been a year since I birthed Gear...I'm writing a reflection piece for my LJ and the site.
Chrissy: ohhhh
Chrissy: cool :)
Chrissy: how youf eel about getting as far as you have etc?
Me: its...odd...
Me: i feel like
Me: we've come a long way
Me: and ive learned a lot
Chrissy: :)
Me: but all i keep thinking is
Me: its not enough
Me: we have to keep pushing
Me: we have to be better
Me: because i know we can
Chrissy: good attitude to have
Me: it keeps getting better through trial and error...we're gonna get there
Chrissy: mm :)
Chrissy: i think this volume is going to come out nicely
Chrissy: and yes I think it will keep progressing
Me: you know what I think
Me: I think I'm making a goal
Me: you know how we're going to comic con
Me: february, right?
Chrissy: yep
Me: you know those panels
Me: where someone famous talks about their stuff
Chrissy: yep
Me: and how they got there
Me: yeah
Me: less than 5 years
Me: thats gonna be us
Chrissy: LOL :D
Me: its true
Chrissy: yeah i agree
Chrissy: :)
Me: it will happen
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| Josh's Fenix Gear Birthday! |
[ | | TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 30, 9:02 PM] |
Hey guys. As some of yu know from the private entry, I've been doing some soul searching regarding the comic and have come to a decision.
I want nothing for my birthday.
I'm serious. Nothing. Absolutely nothing. It's all stuff I don't really need or care for (except Naruto Ninja Storm, but that's covered...thanks Rori). What I want is Fenix Gear.
I am hiring an artist and what I want is to be able to pay them because I need to approach this professionally. From comic-con, the thing that stuck with me most, is that the guy from Image refused to read the comic. He looked at the art and said "I can't sell this. I'll read it when I can." This is my dream. I will be funneling my paychecks towards this, but I need your help. If you really want to help me or do something for me, donate to the link below. The Fenix Gear fund.
This means more than any video game you can get for me.
Thank you.
I'm OUT!!!
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