Eccentrically Me

Yeah, I'd eat a dog.

2009-12-18T14:41:28Z

I am so tired of the hypocritical crap I'm getting about eating meat. Do I like eating meat? Yeah, very much. I love it. The sweet taste of pork, chicken, cow, veal, turtle, rabbit, frog, duck, and every species of fish. It's all good. So why do people give me crap when I say "Yeah, I'd try dog, given the opportunity."

Why are we personalizing this? Because you own one, suddenly it's not cool? That's bullshit! That's primo bullshit. You're adding personality and feelings to what's already a monstrous activity. You are killin an animal (lets say a cow) and chopping up everything it once was, in the most putrid way that I know 75% of all people who eat meat could never do, and then slap a piece of American cheese on it and call it a burger. You know what? Fuck that noise. At least I don't pick and choose. Don't pretend you're better because you don't want broiled labrador. I'm not eating YOUR dog. I'm eating A dog. Just like you ate A cow. What if I named her Betsy? Does that matter? What if I played fetch with that chicken nugget before you dipped it in barbeque sauce? Maybe I'll tag that Thanksgiving turkey on facebook as 'Gobbles.' DO YOU SEE WHAT I'M GETTING AT!?

In all fairness, I don't think I'd ever eat a bug of any type. That shit's gross.

Josh vs. Cancer: Ballistic

2009-10-20T21:26:41Z

I'm sure none of you get the movie reference. Doesn't matter. I'm writing this so everyone's in the loop about my cancer/goiter/god-knows-what woes. Specifically about how I'll be getting surgery on the 20th of November.

So, I'm pretty sure most of you know about my adventure with this since April. The surgery is the only NEW piece of info. If you want a recap, read on. But if you're only curious about the latest news,, see the section marked SURGERY.

THYROID CANCER (kinda)

So, it all started in March/April, when I was home, and my mother noticed that my neck had a large bump. We thought my lymph nodes were enlarged and I was possibly infected or sick and didn't realize it. I was seeing the doctor anyway, so we asked him what he thought, not thinking much of it. That was until he told us it wasn't my lymph node. It was my thyroid, which should never be that big.

Before i knew it, I was rushed in for a sonogram and they saw a growth there. A bad one. When your doctor implies the worst, and your family has a history of thyroid cancer (grandmother), things get grim. I was in and out of doctors, getting a total of 3 biopsys trying to determine what I actually had.

It turns out, after the second one, that the sist, huge as it was, was benign. Though they didn't tell me this till I was getting my THIRD biopsy (a whoopsee on the doctors part...I was pretty pissed, but that's a story for another time...this is just for the info). However, while it was likely to stay benign, I'd have to keep an eye on it my whole life and I'd always look like I had a chicken bone stuck in my neck. I wanted it gone. So I went to see a surgeon to discuss my options.

SURGERY

With a cist this size, that side of my thyroid is probably not even functioning anymore. So it can be removed without having to take any supplemental medications to make up for a lack of a thyroid. However, while I'm under, they will be doing another 'biopsy' on the removed part of the thyroid, and find out if I really am benign or malignant. If I am malignant (and we just couldn't get a real reading), then while I'm under, they will take out the whole thyroid and I will be on medication for my whole life, followed by me taking an iodine radiation pill. Basically I will become radioactive and shouldn't be allowed around pregnant women and children for a week while the radioactive iodine locates any cells from the thyroid that got spread and annihilates the hell out of them.

So am I in danger? No. I'm pretty safe. All things considered, I'm not psyched about the surgery, which is why I wanted it done ASAP so I could move on with my life. It's been a long few months. The surgery is November 20th, the Friday before thanksgiving. I will be int he hospital for about a day before going home and recuperating. I could probably go back to work on Monday, Tuesday the latest. If I need to take that iodine pill, I extend my 'vacation' by a week while I crap glowing poo (not really, but that'd be awesome).

So yeah, now you all know. I'll answer any other questions you have, but now you know what's going on. Come the beginning of November, this will be a bad memory and I can move on with my life. As my boss says "After 20, it's all down hill."

Thank you all for your support. I'll keep you posted on any updates.

I'm OUT!

-Josh

Holy Character Assasination, Batman!

2009-01-30T16:01:35Z

So, about a year ago, I started ranting and raving about me never reading Spider-man again, since it soiled its very ground in an attempt to boost sales and gain new readers. All it seemed to do was isolate hardcore fans be the biggest joke of the wall-crawlers career since the Clone Saga. And like that, the entire decision to have a superhero make a FUCKING DEAL WITH THE GODDAMN DEVIL will probably be retconned in a year or two, and laughed at, and then redone (better) in Bendis's Ultimate Spider-Man book. I bring this up because Batman has now joined Spider-Man's ranks in books I refuse to read.

Yes. Batman. Fucking Batman.

Allow me to explain. Writer Grant Morrison has stated that he planned to retire Bruce Wayne as Batman, culminating with an arc appropriately titled "Batman RIP." This title would be followed up in the "Final Crisis" epic (which Morrison was also writing), where we learn the ultimate fate of Batman. From what readers were to understand, the two would play off each other. For starters they didn't. They say it does, but honestly, it seems really loose and unconvincing. Like they slapped some masking tape on the two stories and said "There: now they're tied together." More or less, it was Bruce's last big outing as Batman in an adventure that started epic and heart pulling, but just turned out to be silly. To give you a quick recap, someone figured out his identity, injected Batman with crack, drove him crazy, and systematically started shutting down the very fabric of Bruce's life. Putting the robins on the run, torturing Alfred, releasing the Joker on his girlfriend, etc. This person also claimed to be Thomas Wayne, Bruce's dead father. This is an awesome plot. Random, maybe, but epic in nature and fascinating to study. Makes you really understand why Bruce would retire after this, but how's he gonna get out of it. But then, then it's revealed Batman FUCKING PLANNED FOR THIS ALL ALONG AND WAS ACTING THE PART ENTIRE ARC! What kind of Saturday morning cartoon shit is that? You couldn't think of how Batman was gonna get out of that one and so you just claimed he took acting lessons from Alfred? Are you fucking kidding me? It's like when Luke decided the best way to get to Jabba the Hutt and rescue Han was to put all his other friends in danger first instead of just beating the bad guys up from the start.

Removed from that, then came "Final Crisis," and that's where I reached my breaking point. Around the part where Darkseid kills Bruce (but doesn't) and sends him back in time.

No, you read that right. They retired Batman, by sending him back in time.

I would like to walk you through exactly how Batman was retired. Tell me if any one of these things sounds Batman AT ALL!

1) Batman uses a gun to shoot a man.
2) Batman shoots the man with the intent to kill.
3) The man being shot by Batman is not a Gotham crook or the Joker, but a fucking demi-God.
4) Batman gets lasered by said demi-God until he's dead.
5) Batman is sent back to the time of dinosaurs and makes cave drawings in Batman garb.

There is not one part of this I am making up. This is what happened. Are you fucking kidding me? Is this a joke? The fact that Frank Miller's recent All Star Batman and Robin is truer to character than this is mind blowing. I'd rather that crap be canon than this thing ever being released in one form or another. It's like, Morrison has never read or seen anything Batman before and has no grasp on the character or what he stands for or what he is.

No death in comics is permanent, so death ultimately means nothing (which saddens me, and takes away from the impact), but Jesus Christ, can you at least try?! You are retiring THE SYMBOL of comics everywhere. The very definition of Super Hero cool. One of the most respected and revered and loved characters of all time!!!

I want to say I was excited with the prospect of Bruce retiring or dying and letting someone else take up the cowl and trying to make a new Batman. I was curious to see how someone who isn't Bruce could possibly even try to take up the mantle. But the end doesn't justify the means. Just because you can do things this way, doesn't mean you should. Bruce has had an amazing career as a legendary figure and he deserved a better send off than this! A character like Batman shouldn't be the afterthought of "Final Crisis," a book so focused on the Flashes and Superman. His retirement story (regardless of how temporary), should be legendary. I won't be arrogant enough to say HOW it should have happened, but to end Bruce's run as Batman by having him do things that just ARE NOT BATMAN AND TOTALLY DEMEAN THE CHARACTER is wrong. It's 100% wrong. Just because Batman can be sent back in time by a demi-God after shooting him with a gun, doesn't mean you should. It doesn't make it more epic just because he's never done it before. It's like ending the Simpsons with Homer raping Mrs. Crabapple and then Bart and Lisa fusing so they can fight Maggie's evil twin from the future (though, I would watch that episode).

I really dug Morrison's All Star Superman and his New X-Men books. But he fucked the Dark Knight. He fucked him good. Morrison, you really fucked up. DC Comics, you fucked up even more by allowing this to happen.

Rot in hell Batman. It's a better fate than ever letting Grant Morrison near you again.

I'm OUT!!

Reflections

2008-12-26T02:03:40Z

I’m sitting here, looking through a few things. Specifically all my Fenix Gear work. It’s been exactly one year since I finished issue 1 of Fenix Gear (which looks like it might be renumbered to issue #0).

Fenix Gear has come a long way this last year. There was me trying to get the damn thing printed, there was my experience getting chewed out at comic con, there’s the issue I was doing with Twist that never got to be, there was the successful mini issue that had me trying something new, there was working with Omar, Chris, Stephen, Twist, and Jim on various accounts, my meeting Chrissy, me seeing Chrissy’s art and being inspired to write this new issue, and now we’re here.

As I type this, Chrissy is currently doing the pencils on the first page of her first comic for Fenix Gear. First of many, I hope, since I enjoy working with her so much. I take this time now to see how far Leylie, Zoe, and Carolyn have come.

The idea behind Fenix Gear is old, spanning back to my sophomore days in High School. It was a constantly evolving process (did you know the main character was a guy with a dark God inside him in the beginning). It slowly spun and turned in my head until I came up with this fascinating tail about three girls trying to be heroes, but can’t get it right. I made a decision in September 2006 to make a comic. I had to get up and do something. What began was a +1 year of working on my first issue of Fenix Gear with Stephen Krock in a tediously harsh lesson on the wrong way to ink and color comics. 1 Year ago, I birthed my creation into the world. It’s 1 year old today. Happy Birthday Fenix Gear.

The decision to move forward with Gear, rather than let it wrestle in my imagination until I’m old and grey, has changed my life. For the better. It has given me motivation and drive. It’s given me something to truly care for that’s bigger than myself. It keeps me from being sucked into the grind of boring life and leaves me with a sense of…hope. A sense that I’m doing something worthwhile. It’s…love. True love. Nothing else comes close to describing it. Fully and truly and whole heartedly, I love Fenix Gear.

I can’t wait to show you guys what’s next. I can’t wait to show you what me and Chrissy have planned. The stories we want to tell. The characters we want to introduce. The hope that we feel emanating from this project. A friend told me she believes in Fenix Gear. Jim, originally unsure of taking on another project, has put a hold on his own work for mine because he believes in Fenix Gear. This product has effected more than me. We all believe in it. And that sort of thing…it means worlds to me.

Thank you, everyone. Thank you so much for this.

I wish you all a happy holidays.

-Josh

Me: hey
Me: was just writing about you
Chrissy: hey
Chrissy: you were? what about?
Me: its been a year since I birthed Gear...I'm writing a reflection piece for my LJ and the site.
Chrissy: ohhhh
Chrissy: cool :)
Chrissy: how youf eel about getting as far as you have etc?
Me: its...odd...
Me: i feel like
Me: we've come a long way
Me: and ive learned a lot
Chrissy: :)
Me: but all i keep thinking is
Me: its not enough
Me: we have to keep pushing
Me: we have to be better
Me: because i know we can
Chrissy: good attitude to have
Me: it keeps getting better through trial and error...we're gonna get there
Chrissy: mm :)
Chrissy: i think this volume is going to come out nicely
Chrissy: and yes I think it will keep progressing
Me: you know what I think
Me: I think I'm making a goal
Me: you know how we're going to comic con
Me: february, right?
Chrissy: yep
Me: you know those panels
Me: where someone famous talks about their stuff
Chrissy: yep
Me: and how they got there
Me: yeah
Me: less than 5 years
Me: thats gonna be us
Chrissy: LOL :D
Me: its true
Chrissy: yeah i agree
Chrissy: :)
Me: it will happen

I swear, you can taste my tears just watching this...

2008-12-11T00:48:30Z

Dragonball...Evolution?

WHERE IS YOUR GOD NOW!?!?!

To quote a friend "....i feel like this is some twisted universe that i don't belong in"

I'm OUT!

Josh's Fenix Gear Birthday!

2008-10-01T01:07:06Z

Hey guys. As some of yu know from the private entry, I've been doing some soul searching regarding the comic and have come to a decision.

I want nothing for my birthday.

I'm serious. Nothing. Absolutely nothing. It's all stuff I don't really need or care for (except Naruto Ninja Storm, but that's covered...thanks Rori). What I want is Fenix Gear.

I am hiring an artist and what I want is to be able to pay them because I need to approach this professionally. From comic-con, the thing that stuck with me most, is that the guy from Image refused to read the comic. He looked at the art and said "I can't sell this. I'll read it when I can." This is my dream. I will be funneling my paychecks towards this, but I need your help. If you really want to help me or do something for me, donate to the link below. The Fenix Gear fund.

This means more than any video game you can get for me.

Thank you.

I'm OUT!!!

Charlie the Unicorn 2!!!

2008-09-21T14:30:18Z

DID ANYONE ELSE KNOW THERE'S A SEQUEL!? I DIDN'T!

BEHOLD!

I'm OUT!

Brand New Fenix Gear & Website! Available now!

2008-08-29T03:09:01Z

The mini issue of Fenix Gear is complete. So am I putting this up here, or on DA. Nope!

How about the brand new FENIX GEAR website!!

That's right. Come on over to www.fenix-gear.com which is the new hub for all FENIX GEAR activities. The new issue is short, but is packed with concept art and news.

I'm really excited about this website and the work accomplished. You can view the comic in a comic reader program that's really neat, or download it via pdf, as well as the first issue. There's also a character page, fan art section (no fan art yet), and a link so you can share it on facebook (please do...GET THE WORD OUT!). We'll also have stuff in the future, including audio COMMENTARY on the concept art and comic, so look forward to it.

Thank you to everyone for your support! Enjoy the new issue. I'll keep you posted on news regarding the next issue.

I'm OUT!

ME WANT! A BIRTHDAY ITEM!

2008-08-06T14:55:54Z

Little BIG Planet comes out on October 21st. A day before my birthday. And I think someone(s) should get it for me. And here's why:

and

Also, I can finally make my life long dream: FENIX GEAR THE GAME! Exclusively for the PS3 (the way it should be!).

So here's my idea. A PS3 game isn't cheap (60 bucks), so what I'm gonna do is say, if anyone wants to reserve this game (which is the only way to get the characters above, but not 100% necessary), they can talk with a few of my other friends and split the gifts amongst themselves. If you want to take this heralding task, respond ANONYMOUSLY to this post. That way I don't know who's doing what and that way others will know that you are getting it so we don't have mountains of the same gift.

I concede that its possible no one will respond, which is fine. In which case, if long enough passes, I'll just get this game with my own birthday money. But I thought I'd throw this out there.

I will stop talking like a spoiled brat that gets everything on his birthday starting...NOW!

I'm OUT!!!

PS: Finally, Issue 1.5 is done sans the color of the cover. I'll be posting it shortly

Shit...Michael Turner died...

2008-06-29T21:14:46Z

I just heard about Michael Turner (artist of Witchblade, Supergirl, and hundreds of Marvel covers), losing a battle with cancer. An AMAZINGLY talented artist, now dead at 37. 37!!

This just burns me really. It pisses me off. This actually shocks me more than the George Carlin death (which was horribly unbelievable to me too). Two things really get to me about this.

1) Michael Turner was one of my favorite artists. He knew how to draw strong women and evil villains. He was just jaw droppingly amazing. And honestly...I secretly hoped, one day I could get him to do a single issue of Fenix Gear for me. Or at least commission him to do a full cover. I loved his stuff, and it saddens me greatly that I can't mix it with my own.

2) This guy was more than an artist. He was a writer. And as a writer, he had his hands in many comic books of his own creation. And a lot of these will never be finished, which is really sad. To have somethign you work for all your life and...well, you understand.

I'm sad to see you go Mr. Turner. I will miss the beauty you brought to this world.

On the subject of Gears (Fenix variety)

2008-06-06T22:20:17Z

So, why not give everyone an update:

I'm pretty sure everyone who reads this is aware already, but for those still in the dark, FG Issue #2 is cancelled/indefinite hiatus. Things just didn't work out is all you need to know.

Now, I really wasn't as broken up about this as I thought. It gave me a moment of clarity. FG is not nearly as organized as I want it to be, whether it be individual issues or the story. The series bible is actually still incomplete (a series bible is kind of the outline of the whole series, describing every increment of the characters and the plotline they will follow and relationship and etc). I'm more of an improv guy, making it up as I go along so things are more natural. And that does work (to an extent). However, I need a map. I temporary guide. And when I need to, I will divert from the path, with fair knowledge of how this effects my overarching tale of my girls.

So here I am: I'm back to work on the bible. It's coming along nicely. I've finished character sheets for the main characters, and now working on the major villains I want to throw in. I've done all the backstory research. Now I just need to organize future plans. I'm very happy. It feels like its coming together nicely.

When I finish, will I begin issue 2? Maybe. I actually want to write an issue #0 first for the appropriate backstory and knowledge you need going into the world of 'Fenix Gear.' I might not turn issue 0 into a book, and just write it for myself, but I realize I'm about to dump an absurd amount of info on viewers with issue 2, and I'd like to ease the transition and make it an enjoyable comic through and through.

Now, the mini-issue. The mini issue IS STILL COMING! How soon? The mini issue will be coming in two forms- Manga style (B&W tones) and Color (Chris Shields is whipping up something special). The manga style will be done by the end of the month (!!!). The color, most likely next month or so (we're still trying to nail down a color style that fits this). I'd put up preview work, but since the issue is only, like, 6 pages, I'm kind of giving away a majority of the book. The mini features Carolyn, since she didn't get much screen time in issue 1. The book is pencilled by Stephen, inked by Jim, and colored by Chris. Seeing a team effort instead of just me and Stephen makes the product, as a whole, look MUCH better than before. I'm really excited.

So, I think that's it. We'll see where it goes from here. Check back in a month and I'll link you to the manga shades...2 months or so for color.

I'm OUT!

Electric Buu-galoo

2008-06-06T17:51:45Z

This is the reason why I can't see the Bleach movie in theaters next week: hearing a person yell out an attack (like Kamehameha or White Lightning), makes me just cringe.

But this does bring up a topic I've wanted to talk about for some time. I'll have two entries today. The first will be DBZ related. The other post will update people on Fenix Gear, as I haven't really brought it up in a while.

Just to note, a lot of this will be DBZ nerding, but then I'm going to be talking about writing and story structure and how the two topics are related. Read on if you want to hear my nerdy DBZ explanation, but you can just as easily skip to 'THE POINT.'

The new DBZ game doesn't have any of the Buu saga in it, cutting off at the end of the Cell arc. Some think this is a huge backwards step, especially considering the sheer volume of characters and arcs in the last game. However, I'm not entirely broken up about this. Most people know I'm a HUGE DBZ head. So understand how serious I am when I say this next statement.

The Majin Buu arc sucks monkey fuck.

Sucks monkey fuck.

Now, it sucks for a variety of reasons: the pacing, the inclusion of the bratty Kid Trunks and Goten, Buu is just plain silly. These are all valid. However, I can actually pinpoint the moment DBZ started to suck, and it's the second (and I mean the second, there is a Super Saiyan 2.

Woah! Wait a minute Josh. Super Saiyan 2 was introduced in the Cell arc, and you just said-

Yes, I know what I said, but in order for this to make sense you a) have to be a giant DBZ nerd like me, and b) going all the way back to where it all started, 'Dragonball.'

Back in the day of DragonBall, power levels weren't really a big deal. All fights came down to the main character tricking the bad guy into using the wrong technique or something. It was much smarter, similar to how Naruto is. This continued, even into the Vegeta arc, where power levels weren't a big factor. Sure Vegeta was stronger than Goku, Krillin, Gohan, and Yajirobe. But through persistence, charm, and luck, they felled the opponent of that arc.

Problems occurred in the Frieza arc. Here was an opponent with the power of a God compared to the heroes. How do you defeat an opponent so mighty. What happened was the start of something awful. Something that would damn all shonens after DBZ: the Deus Ex Machina Transformation. Goku turned into a Gold Haired super powered version of himself called 'Super Saiyan.' You may know it today as 'Bankai' or 'Nine Tailed Fox.' The transformation which is the magical 'make the character stronger' button. This cheapened all the skills you could ever bring, because once you have the button that makes all the bad guys dead, all intelligence required is thrown out the window.

But I didn't mind then, and while it irks me in anime today, this was my first. I couldn't see the horrible pattern it had created just yet. Super Saiyan was special. Only one warrior a generation could do it, and of course it was the main character, not Vegeta, his rival and the one who, by blood rights, should have inherited the trait. So we move onto the Cell saga...

We start off, almost immediately, destroying DBZ's foundation. A mysterious warrior shows up named Trunks and, lo and behold, he is ALSO a super saiyan. What about one a generation?! SHENNANIGANS! Ah, but this was saved (temporarily): Trunks is from the future, and the son of Vegeta. Now it's interesting again. The next generation super warrior isn't Vegeta, but his son, and he's shown up to help with a threat even stronger than Super Saiyan. Alright! this is badass. This is what I want to hear.

Then Vegeta turned Super Saiyan. Then Gohan. Then their cat, Puar (OK, not really, but still). The best way to compare it is the Pirates of the Caribbean sequels. Everyone in those movies was a pirate. And when everyone's a pirate (to the extent where Jack Sparrow was recruiting MORE pirates in movie 2, and then held a counsel for them in movie 3), pirates aren't special anymore. If anyone can be a pirate, why should I care? What's the achievement? If everyone is a Super Saiyan, why is Goku so special?

This was redeemed, however, at the end of the Cell arc, when Gohan goes what we now know as Super Saiyan 2. But here's my point: we didn't KNOW it was called Super Saiyan 2 then, and I doubt the creator did either then. As far as we were concerned, we had just witnessed what a true Super Saiyan is. This is the real legendary warrior. And that was satisfying. We watched Gohan grow from the pussy son of Goku to the legendary protector of the planet, stronger than his father, the main character. It was a fabulous ending.

However, then Buu came and ruined everything. I can even pinpoint when: not when Vegeta goes Super Saiyan 2 (I excused that, because the Majin thing made him like a steroid powered warrior, so it sort of made sense), but when GOKU went Super Saiyan 2. So he can do it? Well awesome. Now nothing is special anymore. Everything was silly. It was like playing a board game with a kid that just keeps making up rules, but you can't argue because it's his game and you've never played before.

Then it kept going: Super Saiyan 3, Magic Fusion Dance, Magic Fusion Earrings,and eventually, Super Saiyan 4 Fusion Dance. It wasn't special. It was silly.

So that's my long winded, hyper nerdy explanation about why I hate the Buu arc. It ruined DBZ for me. All its other horrible faults I can forgive. It was bad, but a 'good' sort of bad, with an amazing story at its core (yes, it is an amazing story at its core, but thats a rant for another time). But this just cheapened it for me. You can say what you want about the rest of the series, and I'll be the first to admit its faults. But I loved it.

THE POINT

I bring this up because certain shows rely on the same tricks to save them again and again. It gets old. The shock value I got out of Nip/Tuck wore off after a while. The progression of the mysteries in 'Lost' became unbearably annoying after a time. Even 24 wore on me after a while, but as opposed to the other shows, 24 attempted to reinvent its twists and show structure in season 5, rather than relying on its old bag of tricks.

I suppose everything has a shelf life. What makes it magical isn't so magical 3 years later. I was a wrestling fan for a while, but after a while, all wrestling matches looked the same. All the plot twists felt the same. You have to move on. Its hard to stay with a show too long. I believe the longest I've ever stayed with a show is South Park, which I've watched since its inception over a decade ago. However, even that I can only watch for so long, before every episode is, at its core, the same.

I'll bring this up more later, but I really hope Fenix Gear doesn't get old for me. I hope I can keep it fresh for myself. The same goes for all the stories I want to attempt one day. I hope I can keep myself from hating what I start out loving so much. I absolutely LOVED lost in the beginning, but now I think it's an abomination of its former self.

I think I'm done for now. TTYL.

I'm OUT!

My Soul Will Soar in Any Body!!!

2008-05-22T16:46:14Z

The above is something Doc Hammer said at the Venture Brothers Panel. Really dug it.

I thought I'd write a new post, being that I just saw 'What Happens in Vegas' with my family last night. I thought I should give you some reactions.

Now the movie, as I predicted, was bad. Bad bad bad. Horrible characterization, no chemistry between Ashton and Cameron, predictable plot. It was bad. As a movie, it failed.

However, it wasn't THAT bad.

It never made me wanna claw my eyes out. And, I actually enjoyed this MORE than 'The Good Shepard' or 'American Gangster,' so I guess that's something (in a retarded sort of way). It was fun. Stupid mindless fluff fun, but fun all the same. I will say that I wish the film was about the relationship between Tipper (Lake Bell) and Hater (Rob Corddry), since they had a) genuine chemistry and b) were balls to the walls hilarious. What could have been...

I suppose what it comes down to is that Dana Fox (scriptwriter), has this thing where, instead of showing us who the characters are, she TELLS us. If you've ever taken an acting class, you know that this is a huge no no. Can you imagine an Iron Man where, instead of us seeing how decadent and cut off he is with his gambling and drinking, and not letting people have a serious conversation with him, he said to us "Hey, I hate takign things seriously. I like to gamble and have sex. This is who I am." Much less effective, and the biggest problem of this movie.

Now the PA stuff. I couldn't watch this movie without thinking "Oh hey, I locked that up." Or "Hey, that took 5 hours to shoot and they used...one second of it." It was frustrating at times. It made me feel small, actually, and insignificant in the grand scheme of the movie. It also destroyed the magic, which is a huge thing to me. Movies should be magic, and PAing then watching the movie, even one like this, kills the magic. Kind of like knowing how a magician does a trick. Sur eyou wanna know, but the second you do, minus that glowing pompous "yeah I can do that." feeling, the trick loses its appeal. It's done. And that's kind of sad for me.

As soon as I can, I'm getting out of the PAing business. Anyone have a job for me?

Congrats to new graduates.

I'm OUT!

Rants and Reviews: Modern Cinema and Iron Man

2008-05-02T19:42:42Z

I'd like to take a moment to talk about movies and why I hate them so. I will also be reviewing Iron Man here, as I just saw it last night and it makes a great point to what I'm talking about. I will also be very friendly regarding spoilers, and go over nothing that doesn't appear in the trailer.

WHAT HAPPENS IN VEGAS:

I would like to point out that today's movies, or even today's modern entertainment venue, makes me sick. I mean it. When I think about most movies, I want to puke. The reason why is this:

I suppose I'm more personally attached to this since I PAed on the picture, but lets remove that from the equation for a second. Look at this poster. Well what does it tell you? It tells you the title, who is in the picture, and since they are laughing, we'll take a guess that its a romantic comedy. OK. Fine. Romantic comedies are fine, and I happen to be partial to the few done well (Hitch, Someone Like You, 10 Things I Hate About You). But lets look at this poster some more.

We really know NOTHING about this movie. NOTHING! This poster is, for all intents and purposes, a glamour shot. We aren't selling the movie: we are selling the ACTORS!!!

And this is why modern cinema sucks. It sucks a big hairy nutsickle. Because we don't sell the product, we sell the person in it. We sell that Will Ferrell is making an ass out of himself for the whole family. We're selling Hugh Grant being charmingly British. We don't sell the plot, or the story, or why this movie is worth $10.50. If I wanted to look at Lindsay Lohan for an hour and a half of 2D acting, I'd just stay on the internet. Where it's free. I'm paying for entertainment, and there is none.

To quote Maebe Funke of Arrested Development "Why are we targeting this idiot demographic?" Of course people keep making these movies. We keep watching them! We don't challenge people or give them something new. And then when something genuine comes along, we act like its special. Like Juno. Well you know what? I liked Juno a lot (I won't say it's the best, but it's undeniably well done and will be the comparison here on out, seeing as its also a sort of romantic comedy), but it shouldn't be special. It should be what we reach for every time. Who the hell is Ellen Page? The chick in X3? Never heard of her. But instead, she crafted a character. She didn't play herself!

What Happens in Vegas is being sold on Ashton and Cameron. Just to prove my point, there is a huge poster going into NYC. 1/3rd of the poster says CAMERON, next 1/3rd says VS., and the final 1/3rd says ASHTON. In tiny letters underneath it says 'Vegas' and 'May 9th'. IT DOESNT EVEN HAVE THE FULL TITLE!

What's worse, 70 MILLION DOLLARS WAS SPENT ON THIS! This money could have funded FIVE JUNOS! This money could feed the homeless. Make the world a better place. You know what it's spent on? Ashton Kutcher making jokes about spousal abuse.

MOVIES IN GENERAL:

The majority of movies falls into 4 categories: 1) Sequels, 2) Remakes, 3) Comic Book/Book/Video Game Adaptations, 4) Romantic comedies (where the poster just advertises who is in it, not what it's about). The fact that the most original thing on this list is number 4, frightens me. It truly does. Romantic comedies wouldn't be on my list if it weren't for the fact that EVERY SINGLE ONE IS SO FUCKING FORMULAIC. Guy meets girl, girl and guy heat each other, girl and guy have funny antics, guy and girl fall for each other, but wont admit it, they do admit it, then they have a big fight, then they have a montage, then they get together. EVERY SINGLE FUCKING TIME!!!!

Go into any movie theater and look at all the posters. I am willing to bet you, any one of you, that there are more unoriginal properties being advertised than new creative ideas trying to pave the way.

The fact is that most originality stops at the planning phase. "I think Santa should have a brother named Fred." I would be surprised if they just turned on the camera and told Vince Vaughn to just dick around for an hour and a half. Scary movies are really where originality is at now, but seriously, even they are grasping at straws. "Lets have a movie about killer...bats." Great thought, idiot!

Th thing that gets me maddest is that I'm just as much part of the problem. What did I want to see this summer? Speed Racer and Dark Knight. In my own defense, Speed Racer is trying something new with computer technology. Dark Knight, well, I have to say that the ballsiest thing I've heard so far was when Nolan took the name 'Batman' out of the title. This film is at least trying to sell the characters and not the actors, which gives it a thumbs up in my book.

But the truth is that this summer, I look around and I see a carnival of freaks. I look around and it makes me sick. It makes me cringe. I can't take it. I can't take this industry. Its horrible!!!

MUSIC:

I can trace this idiocy all the way back to record players, but more specifically, Tape recorders. I say this because the main function of said device is to replay our favorite songs agin and again and again. We take it on the go and we brainwash ourselves to love something. And that's the problem. Many people are content with leavign the same tape in their player for years, not changing it out.

Now, it's your own business if you wanna just keep listening to the same Beatles cover again and again. It's your business. But this is affecting everyone on a global scale. We keep rereleasing the same thing because it's safe. Special edition. Platinum Edition. Ultimate Edition. It's insane. And they keep doing it because it works. We keep buying it!

IRON MAN:

So I was very very very hesitant about seeing Iron Man. I originally wasn't going to. I felt that this would only perpetuate the problem. But then I saw the reviews. 94% on Rotten Tomatoes is a hard thing to ignore. So, me and a friend sat down and watched the movie beginning to end. And at the end of the movie, I realized something:

I had fun!

Remember when movies were fun and you didn't regret paying 10 dollars for entry? That's what this movie was. It was enjoyable for comic fans and non comic fans alike. It had great character development, good action, and was funny. FUNNY! Not trying to be funny, but GENUINELY FUNNY!

I can go on and on about Robert Downey in this, but suffice to say, he owns this part. He becomes Tony Stark. I can say the same for Jeff Bridges, who I totally forgot was even in this movie (as Obidiah Stane). You know what this movie didn't do: it didn't show the cast's name during the opening of the movie. Instead, we were flung into a world where these people became their characters. The credits were where they belonged: at the end. Like an actor taking a bow to revel in his performance. An actor doesn't come on stage and announce who they are before they give their performance! Unless they are Jimmy Fallon or something.

Here's something I've been doing for the last 5 years of movie watching: looking at my watch. Wondering how much was left. Whether or not I liked the movie, I'd look at my watch. Perhaps because I was still so removed fromt he experience. During Iron Man I NEVER looked at my watch. Ever. First time in YEARS! This is what I'm supposed to be paying for. Most movies, I feel ripped off. This is the first movie, where I felt that I got the better deal.

Is this the best comic book movie ever? Hard to say but, no. Honestly, I think Batman Begins is about as top tier as it gets. However, of all the Marvel movies. Iron Man decimates the competition. Yes, it's better than X2 or Spiderman (or Spiderman 2, since the fan base is split on which is better). This is really how summer movies, in fact, most movies should be. They should be enjoyable. I had a good time! Why can't we keep this trend up!?

Next week, I'll be seeing Speed Racer, which will have its work cut out for it, having to follow Iron Man. Hopefully, it will continue the trend of enjoyable movie experience.

IN CONCLUSION:

This blog won't reach many people. Just the handful that read it. And the ones who do read it aren't the ones who would see 'What Happens in Vegas.' So I'm not trying to convince anyone of anything. I'm pretty sure most of you agree with a majority of what I preach. But sometimes you have to just throw it out there.

Honestly, I'm being a lot more strict with how I spend my money in the theater, and I believe you should too. Things need to have amazing reviews now to even warrant my attention. Like an election, every vote counts, and the sooner people stop seeing these movies, the less they will be made.

WOOO! I'm done.

I'm OUT!

Post Comic Con Entry

2008-04-22T23:55:05Z

Pretty sure you all knew this was coming. I've already told a bunch of you about the big events that took place. But for those who are out of the loop, read on true believers! Warning: Tatara-length entry ahoy! For those who just want the bullet breakdowns, skip to the bottom.

I attended Comic Con with Jim Whaley, UTC partner and friend. I quickly learned that comic con was going to be more work than play. Almost all the panels I wanted to go to were skipped. Why? Because I was busy shmoozing the floor. The Bendis/Loeb fiasco really was a good learning experience, because I don't mind saying, I was dynamite. I knew how to talk to everyone and was nice and positive and a force to be reckoned. All the major comic companies received a copy of the comic.

The first big thing happened on Friday. I waited on a line to have my portfolio (aka: FG #1) reviewed by editors at Image comics. I was next when they said 'Lunch break! Be back at 6PM.' I showed up at 530 to start a new line, since I didn't want to miss a writers panel at 7. 6 o clock came and he wasn't there. 630 no go. 7 still not there. 715. the guy finally showed up. I was in an irritated mood, since I had yet to eat and had been standing for almost 2 hours waiting for him. But I didn't let it show as he...tore me a new one. Apparently, unless I have Michael Turner doing my arts for me (with the infinite money budget all indie people possess), they won't bother to read my writing or try and give me a chance. But unless they give me said chance, my ability to get artists like Jim Lee are non-existent. The catch 22 nearly brought me to tears. I was nearly inconsolable. I could barely drag myself to the end of the writers panel. I luckily was able to hand my work to a few writers, and one pointed me towards the tokyopop booth. Being that I was in a bad mood (and the booth was closed), I stayed my visit till the next day. Jim and I grabbed some Grey's Papaya and a beer, which cheered me up immensely.

Day 2 is a day that shall live in infamy with me. Lots of big things happened.

I signed up for a portfolio review with Tokyopop. While waiting for my turn, I met an amazing artist named Effendy Anuar ( Deviant Art). Nice guy and we chatted about trying to make it. When it came my turn, while others spent about 15 minutes talking, mine took nearly a half hour. Why? Because they LOVED IT! Obviously, issue 1 wasn't without flaws, but they were really all over the idea and product. At the end, I asked what are my chances of success if I submitted the mini issue (which should be inked in about a month). She said with a good synopsis and everything, my chances were VERY GOOD! I felt amazing! As I was leaving, Effendy, who was listening, said good bye and approached me about contacting him if I ever needed a new artist. Solid gold! It felt good to be popular and loved. Some are wondering if this effects issue 2 and it doesn't. Who knows what the future might hold, but Effendy is a new friend for future possible projects.

Up next was the Venture Brothers panel. And while no big news occured, it was a laugh. Got to pass my comic to Jackson Publik and then ran into my friend Nick. He had never seen the comic, so I handed him a copy. Five minutes later, he gave me a call, telling me that his friend had already read it. How? Going to Midtown comics? No. On my DA? No.

Someone bought Fenix Gear, scanned it, and is now distributing it all over bittorent!!!!

Honestly, this is the coolest thing I've ever heard. It feels like being one of the guys. You can find it easily if you type Fenix Gear into Google (though you might as well just read it on my DA). I love it. And, upon further searching, Nick found that someone's blog REVIEWED ISSUE 1!! This is the first review I've had of the comic that wasn't done by a friend or family member. You can find it here. It's harsh but he makes very good points and some of the compliments are really out of this world (being compared to Penny Arcade and Airplane...amazing). Before anyone asks, yes, Stephen has seen it. He is taking it well, saying now he's gonna work harder "to show this douche that i can do better."

On the final day, there really wasn't much to do. I didn't wanna buy anything (aside from the first trade of 'Scott Pilgrim' on Matt Murphy's recommendation). I got to meet other people who used comixpress, which was badass. I'll post a link to their comic when I find it again (OK, obviously getting lazy from writing so much).

So things are well. Comic Con was great and I'm so glad I went. Even if the Tokyopop thing goes nowhere, it was all an experience that I will cherish. It really was fantastic.

So, the bullet list:
-Got chewed out by image comics.
-Possible new artist for future issues
-Tokyopop gave me a thumbs up with a possible future employment
-Found out Fenix Gear is being pirated
-Found out Fenix Gear has been reviewed on someone's blog
-Found a fellow comixpress survivor and friend
-Met the Venture Brothers, Scott Roomsair, and many writers.

I start PAing again soon. Mostly weekends, but some weekdays. I truly don't wanna and wish to just focus on my writing, but I need some money, so this is a temporary thing.

I'll give you guys the skinny on FG some other time. I'm gonna go relax before work day tomorrow.

I'm OUT!

THAT'S RIGHT, MOTHER FUCKER!

2008-04-16T16:44:17Z

You can order them at this link! BUY ME!!!

I'm OUT!

Pre-Comic Con Entry

2008-04-16T00:10:20Z

So Comic-Con started early. I mean, it started YESTERDAY!

Lemme 'splain.

Many people I'm in love with will not be able to make the comic con, due to it falling on Passover. One such person is Brian Michael Bendis, most famous for his work on Ultimate Spiderman, New Avengers, and now, Secret Invasion. I love Bendis. Really, Ultimate Spiderman is the pinnacle of comic enjoyment for me. So when I heard he was going to be signing comics in the city on Monday, I bolted ot the city with my mega collection of Ult. Spiderman.

Now, the original plan at the con was to start at small tables and work on my comic pitches there. That way, when I got to people like Bendis, I was cool and composed and knew what I was doing. Now, I knew now I had to START with Bendis, which I wasn't quite prepared for. However, when I got there, I was taken by another surprise: Bendis wasn't alone. He was accompanied by Ed Brubacher (Captain America), Greg Pak (Incredible Hulk) and Jeph fucking Loeb (Hush, Long Halloween). Needless to say, I was stunned. Regardless of how I feel about Loebs recent works, he is the one who got me back into comics with Hush. The guy is legendary to me.

So the bad news: when I met them all, I behaved like a gibbering twat. "HI! I LOVE YOUR STUFF! BYE!" Not takign the necessary time to chat them up or make the most of this. I was told to keep the line moving, but I literally BOLTED OUT OF THERE! I beat myself up afterwords. This is why I wanted to start at small tables. I learned a lesson from this, but I'm still kicking myself.

GOOD NEWS: Each one of those writers went home with a copy of Fenix Gear. THUMBS UP, SOLDIER!

So the real comic con starts Thursday. Am I ready? After yesterday's embarrassing affair, I can conclude that I am.

I consider yesterday a trial run, and I have learned from my mistakes. But it woke me up to the reality of the situation. This is a convention embracing what I enjoy and what's fun. The goal is to share my love with others. Just by bringing Fenix Gear with me, I have already succeeded. I'll still be trying to get a job and make the most of comic con, but I am now more relaxed. I'm ready to do what I have to do. I'm proud of the work I have done with Stephen on the first issue, and just as proud of the work I've done with Carolyn and Chris on the new issue. I have nothing to be embarrassed about. I am ready.

I'M NOT JOSIE GROSSIE ANYMORE!!!

I'm OUT!

Pre-Pre-Comic Con entry

2008-04-12T16:47:31Z

I plan to write a little blurb about my thoughts about the up and coming con and my plans, hopes, dreams, etc. However, the focus of that entry is my selfish little self. I figured I should update people a bit on issue 2.

As some of you know, I had to START OVER with inking. So a lot of my previously finished pages (9 of them) are back to the drawing board. Now, before this decision was reached, Chris had already started page 1 and 2, so the idea is to go over these pictures once i get really caught up and inking. In the meantime, I just inked page 3 and am moving onto 4. This inking style is a little longer, but looks much better and more professional. Here is an example. The one on the left is old and the one on the right is new.

So, this issue is gonna be really long, probably 50% longer than the first one. This is something i'll have to be more conscious about in the future. But, one of the reasons its so long is that its an issue AND a 6 page side story. The side story was written by me and Stephen, and he'll be returning to do the mini's art. Carolyn has finished more than 1/3rd of the pencils for the main issue, and I'm very happy. Chris, the new colorist, is...well, he's great, really. Glad he's on the team.

So here, they are, the first 2 pages. I'm gonna have them on me for comic con so people can see the progress of issue 2. Old inking style not included, tell me what you think or fixes I should make to the final issue 2.

I think that's everything FG related. I hope everyone is doing well. I'll give you an update soon.

I'm OUT!

White Lies and Whore Houses

2008-03-11T03:29:11Z

This isn't me stroking my own ego, but I'm too honest and good hearted. I know I'm not the beacon of morality, but I definitely try to do the right thing as often as I can.

I had a job interview (for some money on the side) at Midtown comics. I did great overall (the comic helped), until we got to future plans. He asked what I thought of this gig. I honestly said I want to immerse myself more in the comic world to increase my ability to write it while also making some spare coin. He asked about future gigs and if I'm looking for writing jobs, and I admitted that I will always be looking and I love writing and I'm following the dream, but I would never accept a job if I thought I was just gonna bail. He appreciated my honesty, but I believe my honesty cost me the job (he was nice and straightforward, actually, though he left some doubt that it's still a maybe).

The thing is, I actually beated (beat...the hell is the proper grammar there?) myself up over it the rest of the day. If I had lied, the job would be mine. And I talked to my parents and boss at MMF and they agreed, that I should have sugar coated the truth. OK. Maybe. Fine.

THEN WTF IS THIS HYPOCRISY WITH ELLIOT SPITZER!?!?

Don't get me wrong. He's retarded. He said, in a speech "I'm sorry to my friends and family." BULLSHIT! Don't insult my intelligence. You're only sorry you got caught.

But here's the thing: this guy LIED to get his job and upheld the beliefs he thought would get him where he wanted, not how he actually felt. Is comparing his story to mine extreme. Yes. It absolutely is. But the principle is the same. So a little lie is OK? A white lie? Shouldn't lying just be wrong, end of story?

I just find that we bend the rules according to what benefits us and our conscience the most. I know he was more in the wrong for lying about whores than me lying about future job plans, but seriously. I feel like little lies lead to big lies. It snowballs. Once one thing becomes an exception, you test the boundaries more and more, and then what happens? Why aren't we ENCOURAGING being honest?! Why isn't honesty rewarded? Instead, adjusting the truth Michael Clayton style is the way to get the big happy ending, not being a good person. But don't fuck up! Don't you fuckin' dare get caught, or else we'll just chastise you for taking our own advice.

I only rant because I'm conflicted by it. I feel that being a good person isn't enough to get where you want to go. But is it really worth degrading your beliefs and opinions of right and wrong? Maybe Spitzer was a revolutionary with great ideas, but he was an eccentric. Maybe he got a wife and family and hid his whore house ways because he knew the public would hate it and he had to play the game to do the right thing. This requires giving the guy a huge benefit of the doubt, but seriously. Where is the line?

That's it. Oh, and Fenix Gear is nearly sold out. Pick it up a copy now, because I don't think I can restock the shelves once they sell out (I need to keep a strong stock for comic con).

I'm (sold) OUT!

Spring Break

2008-03-07T00:19:20Z

After a long talk with Twist, I've decided to take the month off from FG. It's been a great ride, but ever since November, it has almost become an obsession, and it's probably in my best interest to take a step back for a bit. I'll be keeping up with how the thing is selling and any other necessary business, but the pencilling, writing, and inking are all on hiatus until the end of March.

Thanks to all my friends, and I shall return...just need to regain some of my sanity.

I'm OUT!

Fenix Gear Day 1: Reflections

2008-03-06T02:33:36Z

So, Fenix Gear was released today, if you didn’t get my facebook message. I would like to take this moment to reflect.

Fenix Gear was on sale all day, but due to work, I was unavailable for its first few hours (though, my father checked it out). I arrived at Midtown comics at 6PM, and stayed there until 730PM, occupying the same space the entire time, leering at the comic behind a bookcase like a depraved stalker. For those of you who know me, understand that it’s a pretty momentous event when I willingly (as in, not stuck on a plane or car), occupy the same location for any period of time longer than 10 minutes.

I would like to simulate the experience for you. If you’re a female, please feel free to replace the word ‘testicles’ with ‘breasts,’ so you aren’t left out of the re-imagining of this grand occasion. Imagine your testicles (remember, breasts), were put, uncomfortably, in a vice grip. It’s not too tight, but the metal is cold and there’s a sense of vulnerability. Now imagine that every time someone goes to pick up a copy of Fenix Gear #1 its like a hand getting ready to release you from this torturous entrapment. However, when they just end up putting the book back, they tighten the vice making your eyes twitch and whole body seize in pain. This is exactly the pleasure I underwent during my 90-minute stay at Midtown Comics.

Allow me to jump back for a moment and say that I am not stupid. Superman has been around longer than I’ve been alive, and the day I outsell a Batman or Spider-Man title will most likely signify the end of times. However, while not stupid, I am an ambitious chum that wants the best for my baby, and I find it pretty annoying when people look at my book and are disappointed that Stephen Krock isn’t actually Jim Lee with his name spelt horribly wrong. Again, Stephen is a great artist, but an indie has a lot to live up to, having a no name artist and writer, that the second they don’t get immediate gratification, they throw the book away in disgust. I’ll be lenient, I suppose, since I wouldn’t have given an indie a second look prior to working on Fenix Gear and understanding the sweat and tears of just trying ink the damn thing. However, now being in their shoes myself, I find the whole situation a test in patience. You have no idea how difficult it is to refrain from strangling the hairy, sweaty, pretentious geek that’s shaped like the stay puffed marshmallow man.

I stayed until one person bought my book, and bought my book they did. Making a call-out to my Ithacan chums, this woman was a strange one, looking like a cross between Kim Gregson and a squirrel. She literally had her nose so close to the page that I thought she was trying to snort the words. However, she took the book, read the first 4 pages, than added it to the register. From the way the storekeeper talked to her (yes, I followed her, blow me), she’s a regular at the store named Margaret. Well Margaret, you have now become my favorite person ever. This is a picture I snapped of without her notice.

After that, I headed to a different register and asked the kind person there if they could supply me with the first issue of Kick-Ass. She obliged, and while making my purchase, I asked if she had seen any number of that indie comic, Fenix Gear being sold. She answered me with a “Oh yeah. Quite a few people.” Whether or not this was my father in several disguises is a mystery, but I smiled, knowing that Margaret wasn’t my only new minion, and went on my way.

I suppose my only regret about the day was that I was alone. Most know that I’m a cynical and evil man when it comes to feelings and love and the gooey stuff. However to live this day, eating out of a bag at White Castle without someone to join me, left me with a sense of loneliness. I went to my Senior Prom with a good friend (Michelle, who was, at that time, my ex), and while I don’t really think about that event for more than ten seconds without rolling my eyes, it hurt not to have ‘the love of my life,’ or ‘a best friend’ by my side to share such a momentous occasion with. It’s sad, not having someone offer me an alcoholic beverage or dinner in honor of my accomplishments, but I’ve already gotten over it. Really, I have, and the only reason I bring it up is because it was a significant part of my day and my thought process, and I want to record every aspect of it. It’s done and if anyone brings it up in the comments box, you will be deleted almost immediately. I’m not kidding.

One of the reasons I was on edge the whole day is that I have finally lost control. Back when I was doing color and lettering and writing, etc, I had my hands in Fenix Gear, constantly, able to manipulate and protect it’s every move. But now that I’ve given it to Midtown, it’s like sending my first child to school. I can’t watch him every day like I did today (for fear that I might lose my mind), so I have to let it go. But not being in control is hard for me. Not because I’m a control freak, but because, well, FG is my baby.

All in all, regardless of my emotions being a tangled web of frustration and distraught, it was an eventful and, dare I say, ‘good’ day. Margaret and the other new member of the Fenix Gear clique have seen to that. I ended the day, rewarding myself with a copy of Kick-Ass and an addition to my denim jacket. I plan to put this patch on the left shoulder. What do you think?

I’m OUT!!!

A Real Conversation

2008-02-28T21:57:50Z

Josh: carolyns coming home
Josh : i want her to bring me a shirt
Twist: In May!!
Twist: I'm so excited.
Josh: you would be
Twist: Lol, she's coming home from JAPAN and you want a shirt?
Twist: It's not like she's coming home from Disney World. XD
Josh: i mean
Josh: those authentic japanese ones
Josh: the ones you only get there
Josh: i put links in her lj entry
Josh: ive always wanted one
Twist: Heh.
Josh: i am justified in my beliefs
Twist: Do you mean a haori, possibly?
Josh: i wanna look damn good
Josh: i dont know
Josh: if thats what its called
Twist: http://www.ginkoya.com/images/haori/m_haori15b.jpg
Josh: no
Josh: more like this
Josh: http://www.goodorient.com/Dragon_Motif_Silk_Kung-Fu_Jacket_P17872
Josh: http://www.goodorient.com/Black_Micro_Suede_Jacket_P17212
Josh: though, what you sent is pretty rad
Twist: XDD
Twist: That's Chinese you dork.
Josh: ...?
Josh: really?
Twist: Yes. XD
Josh: isnt that like the same thing
Twist: No. XD

Learn something new every day...

The secret origin of Josh Breidbart

2008-02-26T01:05:33Z

It probably has more to do with the fact that I'm still sick (my fever broke, and I'm going back to work, but I'm still weak), but I'm feeling light headed and...nervous. Tomorrow, I'm meeting up with the guys from Midtown Comics Time Square to give them the 40 issues of FG.

Logically, I should be excited. I once had the chance to talk with Brian K Vaughn (Y the Last Man), and he told me to put myself out there and go for broke if I really want this. Even if I think its bad, just keep going until you get to your destination. And that's what I did: I kept my head down and plowed through all the scary stuff to get to where I am now...but...

I never really understood why I get stage fright. Very few things make me nervous or scared. While scary movies (and some games) put me on edge, there is no challenge I'd step down from because I was getting butterflies in my stomach.

Some don't know this about me, but my attitude on this stems all the way back to young Josh (14 i think?). Believe it or not, I was really timid and not outspoken back then. Just quiet, reading Star Wars books and playing video games. I was in camp, and it was...heh, it was a performance thing. MTV night. We came up with a dance to a song and the counselors judged us, and whoever did best received the most 'cabin points.' My cabin had a big dance that involved them being next to the pool (where the event would take place). 1 hour prior, it rained, and all our practice went to waste.

My cabin wanted to back down...tell the judges to go fuck themselves because they wouldn't let us do a do over or something. And I...I couldn't. I broke. I couldn't just lay down and die. So, I told my bunk, we had to do something. Anything. We had to try. And they told me to fuck off. So...I was on my own. They said if I wanted to do something, go for it, but they weren't gonna look like asses. So there I was. Go on alone with something unprepared, or take the blow to my pride. I chose the former, and performed Bohemian Rhapsody (a song which now has particularly great meaning to me) for the entire campus by myself.

I killed and received a standing ovation from the whole campus for my performance.

Since then, I rarely get stage fright, and my outspoken tactless attitude was born. Why waste time? Why not say how you feel and do what you want? Why wish for redoes? I don't remember being nervous then, perhaps because I was blinded by my sudden courage. But maybe I would have been had I known how this event would have impacted me for the rest of my life.

The only thing I can conjure as far as my current stage fright is that this is important to me. Fenix Gear is important to me. I'm trying my hardest not to put all my eggs in one basket. I'm trying my hardest to realize that this will probably not be the comic that launches me to stardom. I'm really trying but...how hard did you try not to put all your faith and care into your first love? Fenix Gear is a part of me, more my child than my lover. And to think that I might fail it or let it down scares the crap out of me.

I know all I seem to talk about in my LJ is FG, and maybe I'm even sounding like one of those people who just can't stop chatting about their boyfriend/girlfriend. But it's important to me, and while I'm gonna try to focus less on that and more on me...well, FG is me. It's a part of who I am and who I will become.

I think that's all...reliving the Bohemian Rhapsody thing and reading over my Pride of Baghdad autograph has calmed me down a bit. Thanks for listening.

I'm OUT!

Cure for the Common Immortal

2008-02-24T08:17:20Z

So, I'm sick. Not sure with what. It's probably just a virus, but it's driving me crazy. Can't sleep, can't interact, can't function like a normal human, can't stand up without needing to sit back down. My options are limited right now, so what do I do? I write. Because if history has taught me anything, people write best when they feel like the asscrack of Sasquatch.

The way I imagine disease is little demonic Wolverines (super hero, not the animal), coursing through my veins. And since he's not fond of the tube ride down Dorney Park's Beautiful Blood Kingdom, he claws at the closest thing in his vicinity (my skin), which brings him to a screeching halt. He then claws his way out of my skin, and invites all of his clones to join. Every time I feel sick, every poor of my being feels like it's on fire. I imagine this is how the characters in DBZ feel whenever they are charging energy. Wouldn't you be screaming if pure fire was ripping out of your every pore?

I don't think there's a greater wake up call than when you get sick. To err is human, and we all fuck up and still fuck up, even when we promise to never again. But sickness reminds us that we aren't the Herculean invincible warriors we paint ourselves as. Sickness brings out that we actually are weak, and regardless of that friend of yours who is always brimming with the confidence of a God, nothing proves we are more human than when they reach out, weakly, for that crumpled tissue in their pocket. Sickness is the cure to the common immortal.

All I can do is take Airborne (ew. Tastes like the carbonated piss of Jack Thompson), drink liquids to the point where I'm peeing every 10 minutes, and watch movies like Lethal Weapon 2, The Shadow, Merlin, Hoosiers, and Transformers (on a similar note, was it really necessary to make the robots BLINK? Think about it). I also can't stop farting, making my room a biohazard to anyone in the 12 mile radius.

Hope everyone enjoyed that wonderful article about me in the Ithacan, on a similar note. True to fashion, everyone had only the nicest things to say about Online Dating, while I was the embodiment of Strong Sad, claiming that no good will come of something I'm no good at. Here's the article in case you missed it. Click me!

*fart*

Well, the restroom calls to me again. Love it. Thanks for listening.

I'm OUT!

I know I promised a rant, but...

2008-02-21T17:51:39Z

...my mother sent me this video. A really well written inspirational speech.

Thanks for listening.

I'm OUT!